My life in books 3

The story started in part 1 with Bambi and Christopher Pike and continued in part 2 through Stephen King and "literary stuff."

In this, the last of the series, I move to Scotland in search of Glaswegian accents and easy access to Europe. Hello, crime fiction!

It was my early 20s. I had a Bachelor degree and a massive backpack with a Canadian flag sewn on it. Intending to springboard from the UK into the rest of Europe, I accidentally settled in Edinburgh. It wasn't my fault. I found work in a discount bookstore where staff were allowed to read the books so long as they appeared un-read when you were finished (shhh.) And the #1 author in Edinburgh's bookstores was Ian Rankin, with his series about DI Rebus.

Now I know that setting can be a character, but I didn't until I moved to Edinburgh.

So my introduction to this city was an insider's view. Old city, new city, proud and dirty and gorgeous, with Arthur's Seat, extinct volcano, overshadowing both the Queen's palace and the council estate where I shared a flat with three other travellers. At the heart of the city is the castle, still used by the military yet a tourist attraction, too. I walked to work through the real alleys where fictional DI Rebus investigated bloody murders. Rankin has said that the city personifies Deacon Brodie (a real life Jekyl & Hyde) who operated in its streets. Edinburgh is amazing. It can be setting, character, and moral all at once.

I won't tell you where I worked
but it's in this photo.
So I loved Edinburgh, and I loved the Rebus novels. Combined with Val McDermid's Tony Hill series, Louis Bayard's surprising portrayal of Edgar Allan Poe, and a half-dozen others who appeared at just the right time, this helped me realize that if I needed a guide, genre could give it. I began to understand my stories as beginning with a problem: the body; and a mystery: who did it? From this skeleton I could start to bring something to life (ha.) Though my writing style would later change again it was this shift from amorphous "stuff happens" towards the Crime & Mystery genres that gave me the structure I needed to finish a book.

A good book, I mean. Not the crap I was writing before.

And no surprise that the first "good" book I wrote was set in Edinburgh.

In the last post I promised to tell the truth in this one. And here's why.

I do not believe that any of my previous favourites wrote stereotypes, but it's true that fictional characters need to be sympathetic, they need to be understandable, and they can't alienate their readers too much or they won't have any readers. And yet, most real people are layered with varying degrees of disturbed. As a woman I might like a female hero, but the women of fiction are difficult, swinging between white-washed and wiped-out.

I moved back to Canada and began working in a public library. It was there I picked up Sharp Objects (because of its stark and intriguing cover) and I was amazed by what I read. I dare you to read the first chapter and not recoil, and yet be ultimately tempted to continue. Gillian Flynn said, "Libraries are filled with stories on generations of brutal men, trapped in a cycle of aggression. I wanted to write about the violence of women." Cain and Slaughter also presented me with their heroes, heroes that made me wonder, Them? Really? Are you sure about this?, and yet compelled me to read on.

This was real freedom. I rewrote a book, its protagonist transforming from Meh to Holy Crap! I then edited her back to Oh Dear, and that experiment was worthwhile. I wanted honesty, and I wanted to know that line before I lost my reader, and dance on it a little. Gauguin said that all art is either plagiarism or revolution and I've never wanted to be a copy. Writing men or women, I wanted them to be real. These books demonstrated to me that "real" was possible.

There's a lot more I could say in my exploration of my life through books. There are authors who deserve great thanks (Thomas Perry, Tess Gerritsen, Kate Atkinson) but I'm stopping here because I think I've already accomplished what I intended: to show how important books have been to my life, that they have inspired and changed me, and not just as writer-- but especially as a writer.

I've had a few comments that others might try a similar exploration of their lives in books. I'll be glad to read them! And what an amazing thing for these authors, if they know that their words have had such an effect. As a reader I thank them. As a writer, I want to be them.