For the love of a good book

My dad recently got a Sony Reader and has been enjoying library ebooks. He uses B.C. libraries and he has a good selection to choose from. My aunt, his sister, isn't as mobile as she used to be, so my dad recommended she use her local library to download ebooks from home. She wasn't sure, so he went to her library's website to make sure it would work.

And there he ran headfirst into an issue I touched on in my Library Guide for Writers: when it comes to ebooks, not all libraries are created equal.

Where my aunt lives (in California, and not Los Angeles or San Francisco) the only ebooks her library offers are via links to Project Gutenberg and the Gale Virtual Reference Library. There's no system for checking out ebooks like regular books, and so choice is extremely limited and they'll never see new fiction.

My dad was flabbergasted, which made me happy. This is the kind of flabbergasted someone should be: that the service isn't available. I feel sad for all the people like my aunt who don't have access to these things, and don't even know it's possible to have access.

We usually think that the digital divide refers to differences in massive areas or whole cultures, but here it is between just a few small towns in North America.

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Photo: California Sunset by Lars Schmidt on flickr

Massive Ego and Tiny Voice

A conversation with a good friend led to an evaluation of our writing psyches. We realized that a writer must have multiple personalities, and not just to put themselves in the mind-set of all their characters. There are two very important aspects of your psyche you must develop if you're going to be a successful, happy writer.

They are the Massive Ego and the Tiny Voice.

I'll start with the latter, because it's the easiest. Most writers already have the Tiny Voice down very well:

Oh God. Oh God, my writing sucks. I'm awful. This is awful. This is no doubt the worst thing I've ever written, so I'm getting worse. I wasn't great to begin with, and I'm actually worse now. Should I quit?

Pretty pathetic. And it doesn't sound useful, but actually the Tiny Voice at its most reasonable is the part of ourselves that knows we can do better, and wants to do better, so that's incredible important. It recognizes flaws in our writing, tells us we must fix them and not leave them be. It accepts that others have a better understanding of some things, and so accepts criticism--usually gracefully, because if a Master tells you what to do, you listen, because they know.

As writers, the Tiny Voice develops naturally, as we want more and more to share our work. But it can't operate on its own. If it did, we'd never develop our own voice. We'd just be copying our favourite writers, and saying to those who criticize us, Yeah, you're right, I'll quit. If it was up to the Tiny Voice we probably already would have quit.

Enter the Massive Ego:

Whatever. I don't care what you say, because I'm the best. You might not see it, but I know it without your guidance. My writing is good. It's better than good. It demonstrates skills you don't even understand. You think I should change the dialogue so it focusses on so and so? You're mad. I shouldn't. It's fine the way it is, because I Am Great.

You go, Massive Ego. *high five*

Another seemingly out-of-proportion perspective, and yet absolutely important when paired with Tiny Voice. Massive Ego allows us to evaluate the criticism given to us to determine if it's something we need to care about. Everyone has had feedback from a group or a first reader they weren't sure about: a word change they don't approve of, or an issue with the theme that they didn't think was an issue. Tiny Voice would just change it and lose their original story, but Massive Ego has enough confidence to step back and think, Actually, my way is better. And writers need that confidence if they ever want to develop their writing beyond emulation and delusion.

Make sure you can identify what aspects of your psyche are reacting to the criticism you receive. Are you rolling over and crying because someone told you to change a sentence? Or are you disregarding every recommendation? There needs to be a balance.

It might help to imagine the aspects of your psyche (if it doesn't make you feel too insane.) You could think of your Tiny Voice as a small version of you and your Massive Ego as giant, or your Tiny Voice as a frail old man and your Massive Ego as a sports superstar. Me, I imagine my Tiny Voice as a nearly-invisible creature who whispers and whines, and my Massive Ego looks a lot like Cate Blanchett. Go figure.

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Photo: Split Personality by 1llustr4t0r.com on flickr

Jen, in front of the television

Lately I've been playing a bit* of Skyrim. It's a fantasy RPG set in a snowy world where dragons are appearing, and you're the chosen one to save the world, etc. It's great fun. And if you wander into a little town in the southeast you meet a woman named Temba Wide-Arms.

The name meant nothing to me until someone mentioned that there's a Star Trek: The Next Generation easter egg in the game. "You know, from Darmock..."

Aha!

Darmock is an episode of ST:TNG where Picard is marooned on an alien planet (no, not that one, the other one) with an alien he can't understand, fighting another alien. And now I've mentioned a fantasy RPG video game, and a science fiction television show, and you still have no idea what I'm getting at.

I grew up with ST:TNG and many of its stories have stuck with me into adulthood: the episode where they judge whether Data is a life form, and whether they can take him apart and make more Datas; the episode where they're stuck in the time loop that keeps blowing up the ship; the episode where Picard lives out his life again, this time without being a foolish youth, and ends up being too careful and never becoming captain of the Enterprise--These stories are some of the favourites of my life, and even when they've been done before this is how I was introduced to them first. I had no idea that ideas could be so amazing until ST:TNG got to me.

And then there's the episode Darmock. Yes, Picard is marooned with an alien to defeat another alien, but what makes this a memorable story is the way they can't understand each other. The other alien--Dathon--speaks a language based on metaphor. You have to know the references he's making to understand what he's trying to say. Sort of like if a Star Trek fan were to say, "Kirk and Spock at Vulcan." Or if a Monty Python fan muttered, "It's only a model."

So instead of saying, "We're in a bit of a pickle here trying to defeat this alien together," Dathon says, "Darmock and Jalad at Tanagra." Instead of saying, "Epic fail," he says, "Shaka, when the walls fell." And instead of saying, "Hey Picard, I got you a present," he says, "Temba, his arms wide."

Temba Wide-Arms!

Two things here: first, how marvellous language is because of how we use it, how our words come together and how the very same words can mean something totally different to someone else, or exactly the same: obviously the Skyrim writers and I have a love of that episode in common. And second, how marvellous language is because just a few words can remind us of something that means so much more than the words themselves express: Temba Wide-Arms, Picard, Camelot, dragons, whatever. Who says a picture is worth a thousand words? One word can be worth a thousand memories.

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* It has consumed my every waking moment. Okay, I jest. But it has tried.

Write Anything: "Tough Perspective"

The first year I did NaNoWriMo I knew two other people in the world who were trying it, and that was all. I knew no one in real life and I didn't realize they even had meet-ups. It was a little bit lonely.

It's no longer lonely. In the last decade a lot of people I know online and off have started to participate. Others have been at it since before me, and it's great to find out we've had this in common for so long, even if we didn't realize. Some, I've introduced to NaNoWriMo, and that's always interesting: fun and exciting, because I hope they enjoy it, and a little bit nerve-wracking, like when you recommend a book or game that you love. It's not for everyone. I know this.

I also know that sometimes it would be just fine if the person would put their head down and get to it, and if they didn't let themselves get discouraged and distracted. There's a big difference between quitting NaNoWriMo because it's not for you, and quitting because you're giving up.

Always in the past I've held my tongue and murmured sympathy and told whoever it was that it was okay if they had to give up, I understood. Not today! Today I say what I really think in my Write Anything article "Tough Perspective."

Beware: it isn't for the fragile.

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Photo: Rocky path by Mary & Dan on flickr

Human volunteers at the library

On Wednesday a woman came to the reference desk where I was working and yelled at me for talking about her and telling her what to do, even though I hadn't yet spoken to her (or about her.) On Thursday a man began to shout at his computer, and when I went to investigate he said he was tired of being surrounded by white people, and he thought I was being a racist. I wonder what today will bring?

I took these events stride, as I usually do, though I can't say they never bother me. It's just that they happen a lot. A public library is a place where the customers are often stressed. People come to study, for job searching, to research legal matters, plan their child's schooling, figure out their bills, wrangle new technology, or track down information they can't find elsewhere. Customers are often frustrated, confused, worried, or generally tired and wishing they could work it out themselves. So tensions can be high. On the reference desk I get yelled at when the internet doesn't work correctly, if I can't find the correct information quickly enough, or the information no longer exists in the form the customer requires. And of course also when the photocopier acts up, when the customer and I have a misunderstanding, or when the customer is just a little bit crazy. It's unusual for a week to go by when I'm not yelled at, or at least spoken to like I'm a lower form of life.

I'm not complaining. This is just how it is. But I would like wonder out loud why anyone would allow themselves to be treated this way without compensation? Because if libraries become staffed entirely by volunteers, it won't just be that there are no trained professionals as far as information retrieval and organization. It will also be a situation where people are volunteering to be treated poorly on a regular basis. And honestly, I don't know that they'll do it. Why would you come back to that day after day? Why wouldn't you say: Screw it, I'm going to volunteer at the RSPCA, where at least the cats treat me like I'm human?

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Photo: Approaching menace by Ewan Bellamy on flickr

"Every Sunday" at Every Day Fiction

In the summer of 2009 Ev Bishop and I were looking for inspiration. We each devised some writing exercises, chose a few locations in and around the small town where we lived, and we took each other out on a one day writing retreat. It was just about one of the most wonderful things I've done in my writing life.

One of the places she took me was the tiny chapel at Usk.

Although this chapel is on the side of Highway 16 and visible every time you drive the main (the only) route east, I'd never stopped to take a look. We didn't just look, we went inside. We sat down. And we wrote.

From that time and place, the low ceiling, wood benches and the pulpit watching us from the front, came my story "Every Sunday" that has been published today by Every Day Fiction. You can read it there at the website if you like, or if you've already subscribed you'll get it in your inbox.


As writers we're always looking for that situation where time, place, and emotion come together in inspiration. I don't know what would happen if I revisited Usk Chapel, but at least I had that one day when Felicity came alive.

Killing You Softly with Your Own Words

Writing chair

The second week of NaNoWriMo is just around the corner and it's difficult. Very difficult.

The first week has that great initial buzz and excitement.  A lot of people are involved, enthusiastic and supportive. But in the second week, people you know have dropped out and you don't always know why. The buzz has faded, chores are piling up, people are starting to complain, and the novel has manifested itself as something different than you intended. You've been working hard and yet have three times as long to continue working hard before you're finished. Too much caffeine and not enough sleep. Gah.

To combat this second week chaos I find it useful to go back to my original novel idea and remember why it caught my attention. I like to take a breath and recognize how much work I've done, and how much time I've put aside to write that I would have squandered if I hadn't been trying for this goal. It's also useful to re-examine my intentions for participating this time. This year I wanted to "approach NaNoWriMo as a rest and a writing exercise, a time to stretch my skills and experiment, and remind myself of what mad genius can appear when I let go of my inner critic."

This reminds me that before November I was struggling with my novel writing because I had gotten stuck in the trap of taking everything seriously and not having fun, so I wasn't letting the story flow. I'd also forgotten that you have to take the time to meditate on your ideas, think about the story, and consider what's going to happen next. That non-writing brainstorming time is essential or writing becomes a dreary, soulless exercise. I wasn't giving myself that time, and so I wasn't bonding with my characters beyond as a prop for my story. That's a recipe for an uninspired novel.

So during this tough second week, I'm going to make sure I'm thinking about the story even when I'm not writing. I'm going to converse with my characters and let them have the final say. I'm going to write things I wouldn't normally dare, whether it's within a new genre, or more graphic or more emotional than I usually attempt. I might dare myself to write for an audience I usually ignore. Or I might chicken out. I promise you nothing, except that I will write. And I promise myself that I will learn from this exercise.

Good luck to everyone!

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Photo: Torture Museum 4525 by Sandeep Singh Thukral on flickr

Science Fiction and Proud

Two things from The Bookseller today suggesting revolution. First of all, Charlotte Williams warns that “Mainstream publishers can ‘no longer ignore’ science fiction and fantasy projects, with genre tropes now perceived as an ‘advantage’ in general fiction.” I have no idea who she’s quoting there, but they’re on to something big.

And second, the BBC itself is “broadcasting an item on ‘The Culture Show’ about science fiction next month, in the wake of a row about the broadcaster’s approach to genre fiction.”

One thing that pleases me is that both these articles use the words science fiction as if there’s nothing wrong with the term. This is in a climate where people would rather say speculative fiction, or like the SyFy channel spell it in a completely stupid way to distance themselves from geeky stereotyping.

I love science fiction. The more people who admit that great science fiction includes more than hard sci fi in space ships with interstellar battles, and that being a fan doesn’t mean you live in your parents’ basement, the more great science fiction will be readily available.

My favourite science fiction novels lately include Tess Gerritsen’s Gravity (yes, sci fi—She wrote it before she became known for the Rizzoli & Isles books, and admits it’s her own favourite of her books,) Mira Grant’s Feed series, and John Scalzi’s Old Man’s War. For a classic bit of weirdness read Philip K. Dick’s Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? which is nothing like Bladerunner. I didn’t make it through Margaret Atwood’s The Year of the Flood but the previous book, Oryx & Crake, is wonderful. And a book I thoroughly disliked was Paolo Bacigalupi’s The Windup Girl. Give that a try and tell me I’m wrong.

There’s a lot of great fiction out there, and a lot of great science fiction out there. And it's becoming more cool to love it. Huzzah! Not that we care if we're cool. *cough*

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Photo: Amazing stories by Jonathan Taglione on flickr

NaNoWriMo versus Proper Writing

Read, and the whole world reads with you: friends, family, libraries, book clubs, Oprah Winfrey, Richard & Judy, LibraryThing, Goodreads, Amazon, wherever.

Write, and you write alone.

And what is a writer? Someone who writes, however much or however briefly? Someone who writes and submits their work and attempts publication? Someone who is already published?

Everyone has a definition, either outwardly stated or lodged as an unconscious bias. Occasionally you get the situation where people who love you will cheerfully dismiss your time spent writing if you aren't well published, no matter how much that writing time means to you. It's the old hobby problem. Because if writing is a hobby, it's about as important as painting miniatures in your basement. And you should probably keep that to yourself.

NaNoWriMo is a strange illuminator of these kinds of biases. In the last few years the start of November hasn't just seen an explosion of wordcount updates and writers gone crazy, but also an explosion of loathing for the event. The usual arguments against it are that 50,000 words is not a novel, writing is about more than just high output, and writing a lot of crap all at once does not make you a writer.

Write, and you write alone. This is why it blows my mind that anyone else feels comfortable judging what is and isn't "proper writing." People who aren't participating become angry that anyone would call themselves a writer for the wrong reasons, and use the support from the NaNoWriMo community to prop up their delusions. Fake writers could be screwing it up for the rest of the year, too, but during November they talk about it, and that's just wrong.

It doesn't bother me. I'm nearly certain that all these fake writers are not going to dupe agents and publishers and take proper writers' places on the bestsellers lists. And all the extra words are not going to dilute world literature and make proper writers' suffering less worthwhile.

I won't be spamming my blog with NaNoWriMo all month. Instead, I'll be spamming my Google+ account. You can head over there for a daily update about how my writing sessions are going, or ignore it, and pretend that a couple hundred thousand fake writers aren't wasting their time just out of sight.

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Photo: Typewriter by TheGiantVermin on flickr